Get Quiet…
We will never be able to hear our own voice and heart if we don’t ever make space for quiet. Life is loud, i know this, but we must carve out time to be just with our own thoughts so we can start to discern what is our true voice and what is the voice of other that has snuck in and taken up residence in our minds and hearts.
We adopt beliefs from people all through our lives. They can stick to us like glue, especially from people who raised us, had influence over us and whom we’ve let have influence over us. (i break these into two parts, people who have had influence over us, like professors, aunts/uncles, those with power that have had a direct impact on our thoughts) and those whom we’ve let have influence over us (these are people who we are peers with, who don’t have that inherent power, but who we’ve let turn our focus away from our inner voice and trust theirs instead.)
It is time right now, to sift through those beliefs and discover which are still true to you, from your gut and heart, and which are clingers that don’t serve who you are and are becoming.
I’m not great at sitting still in an upright position and doing a traditional quiet meditation. But one way I love to find quiet is walking without listening to anything. No music, no podcasts or audible, just walking with your thoughts. Start taking deep breaths and see what comes up. (i almost always have to wait through a few terrible songs that my brain serves up, so funny, i love music and have deep love for certain artists and songs and my brain always pulls up something i don’t like from way back when! anyway…)
if you are sorting through a particular issue or question, ask yourself what you think, then listen.
As things come to mind, ask if that is your voice or someone else’s.
Keep listening until you get an answer/thought that feels authentically like yours
Then ask, is this what i want to believe now?
Is this true now for me?
Again the long lasting glue that binds these unserving thoughts to us is thick and so sticky,
ask again and again… but is this true for me now?
See what you get. See if it feels right and true. Jot it down, whip out the notes app or make yourself a voice memo of the results. Then maybe change to another topic if the walk or time allows.
I don’t want you to get bogged down or frustrated, we are cleaning out our brain’s junk drawers, it’s not meant to be a slog.
THEN, phase two, as you settle in at night to sleep or as you wake (this is your choice, i don’t want to monkey with your bedtime routine) is in that space of quiet, look back or listen to these findings. Does it feel true? Ask yourself, what else? Is there more on this? Does it land true?
If yes, wonderful.
If no, let’s take another walk, maybe get out some paper and pen and peel back some layers… try explaining it to yourself as though you are explaining it to your bestie.
other great ways of finding quiet are bathtub time: door closed, fan on to reduce random household or outside noise that could be distracting and .
make time, prioritize time to be quiet and listening.
It’s essential.